“This is the room to talk price.
Here is the lamp, and the rubber gloves.
We accommodate every budget.
This is the Kama Sutra Chair –
300 positions to please both heads.
Here is how to lie back
and save your back.
I’m in charge of the condom,
otherwise they’ll slip it off
or slit it with their thumbnail.
This is the 32 foot bed.
Guys come in here with wedding rings,
propose - you can’t believe them.
They haven’t seen us
outside. They want to party
for free. Then they say
this isn’t business - I’m in love with you.
They don’t know who we are.
You’d love the hot tub
in the Hawaiian room – jets go in all directions.
We show the girlfriends
and wives how to please their men.
This is the princess room,
the handicapped-accessible shower.
We don’t charge extra
for the nurses - they help us lift.
The Madame was a working girl
when her client fell in love, proposed.
So she bought this place
on Ebay – a real life fairy tale.
This morning a lot of girls are home
for Christmas with their children,
their husbands. We aren’t allowed
to fall in love. But we get crushes.
Who doesn’t want for a night
to be someone else?”